And again, it’s been months since I’ve written here. Whenever I think about blogging, I start thinking about what my purpose here should be and if what I want to say fits. My original purpose still sounds nice: I’m interested in developing my creativity, especially in writing, but also in jewelry making, photography, and all the other topics I’ve touched on here. But not all at once, which makes for an uneven blog. But I have a hard time steering my brain away from my current obsession and onto another topic, however worthy. And so, paralyzed with fear, I do nothing. Story of my creative life.
As with fiction, it comes down to writing what I want or writing what I think will be most successful.
I read a lot of blogs and forums about writing, and it seems half the comments and questions are about writing technique and half are about the publishing business. It makes sense, because most of us who write want to be read, and that means building an audience. But a balance has to be struck between what I want to write and what the rest of the world wants to read. I’ve gradually come to accept this idea in fiction writing, concluding that above all, I write what I want to read. When I find myself complaining that I just want to read the story, that writing it is taking too long, then I know I’ve got something worth working on. Surely there’s someone out there who shares my taste?
When I began Here to Create, I was trying to make it smooth, professional, informative, because that’s the kind of blog I was reading at the time. And there’s nothing wrong with that. But I’ve realized since that the blogs I like best are those that have a distinctive voice. They’re less formal, more thoughtful or amusing. A little messy, sometimes off topic.
I’m giving myself permission to relax, be myself a little. Every word doesn’t have to be gold. Sometimes the value is in shared human experience. Another reason I’ve felt uncomfortable writing this blog is that I set myself up in the beginning as having some knowledge worth imparting. I’m not sure that’s true. All I have is my experience, my voice. If someone finds something useful here, that’s wonderful. But I’m not going to let my insecurities keep from writing here anymore.